A year or so ago my sister was attending a conference for work and it included a presentation on The Five Love Languages which are:
- Gift giving
- Quality time
- Words of affirmation
- Acts of service (devotion)
- Physical touch
We started talking about our relationships and what we needed and wanted from our partners. My sister’s primary love language is “words of affirmation” and her new husband is great at it! Sometimes to the point where other guys get annoyed because they have to hear about what Todd did or said, how he’s SO SWEET, and endure comments like “Why can’t you be more like Todd?!” At times I have to admit I am totally guilty of playing this comparison-game. (If we could just combine the best attributes of all of our partners wouldn’t that be amazing!!)
For me, in my crazy/busy life, I feel the most love through “acts of service” …. particularly laundry. I despise putting the clothes away! It makes me feel like a hamster on a wheel.
I know as soon as I put those clothes away, they’re going to get worn again, I will have to pick them up, put them in the washer, switch them to the dryer, and then fold them AND PUT THEM AWAY AGAIN. Just writing this out makes me want to scream. (I know, I know. Some of you are thinking – you need to tell everyone to pick up their own d… clothes and put them in the laundry, to help fold and put their own clothes away. And you’re absolutely right, I should, but I don’t.)
While my husband Chris does not say a lot lovey-dovey stuff to me, I don’t get love notes (other than the occasional Hallmark card on a special occasion) or other grand professions of love but he does all the little things:
- cooks dinner
- does the dishes
- unclogs the toilet
- picks up medicine for me when I’m sick
- and he puts the clothes away!
The little things are the big things and all of these small acts of kindness everyday mean everything to me!